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June 19, 2009
Love across the Pond
Singles can travel to Europe find good mates.
EVA COHEN
What are young folks up to these days in the United Kingdom? Well, it's definitely a different scene than in Canada and, in fact, you could join it if you wanted to. Often, singles from North America fly over to participate in the wide variety of Jewish singles events in the United Kingdom and, while these trans-Atlantic participants are most often New Yorkers, Vancouver's singles also don't need to settle for West Coast events exclusively.
Often, events will vary based on religious affiliation. Toward the more observant end, the U.K. events tend to be more structured and take on a more serious tone, as is often the case in other countries. However, the interesting aspect of singles events in the United Kingdom is not so much the British angle on dating, but rather the exchange that occurs between participants from the United Kingdom and those from other countries.
There are Jewish communities in several U.K. cities, but the centre of the action is London. Here there are several shadchans (matchmakers) who work in private consultation with individuals interested in marriage. There are also shadchans based in Manchester, home to a large Jewish population, and they often cross paths with their London cohorts.
The Jewish population in the United Kingdom is now estimated to be 267,000. These numbers have been looked at worryingly by members of the Jewish community, as it marks a significant decline since the First World War era, when there were more than 500,000 Jews in the country. However, in the last two years, the tide seems to have turned and the population is growing for the first time in more than 80 years. Much of this is accredited to the Orthodox populations in both London and Manchester. This growing demographic suggests that something is being done right in the matchmaking arena!
As there are limited areas with large concentrations of Jews, where are the matches coming from? The U.K. Jewish population has a couple of interesting connections to the rest of Europe. Secular Jews can travel to almost any city in Europe to search for a partner. Shabbatons are held in various European cities throughout the year. This past winter featured a couple of larger singles weekends in Berlin and another in northern Italy. These weekends attract Jews of varying backgrounds.
The cities of Antwerp, Belgium and Zurich are especially popular destinations for shadchans. Shadchans in these various locations have a grasp of who is of age and searching for a partner, so there is some co-ordination between the matchmakers when a new single arrives. There is a dearth of Jews in most of Belgium, but in Antwerp there resides a significant, mostly Orthodox, population of about 20,000; one of the largest in Europe. The traditions of this community meld well with those of young Jews from communities such as Salford in North Manchester and Golders Green in North London. Since travel is so cheap between the United Kingdom and the rest of Europe, it is very simple logistically to co-ordinate matches. A flight from Manchester to Antwerp, for instance, can be as low as 10 pounds, less than taking the train down to London.
For those who stay within the United Kingdom, singles events have been moving toward a more American style. One group, Made in Heaven, have held large singles events in North London over the last few months. At these events, singles rotate seats throughout the meal in order to meet as many of the opposite sex as possible, similar to speed-dating in North America. Traditionally, British Jewry are known to be more reserved, and the active shuffling from person to person is not as popular.
As mentioned earlier, North Americans fly across to the United Kingdom for some of these events, but there tends to be less exchange between participants. The British also fly to North America, but again, usually only to New York. This is done for the practical reason that New York has the most Jews and also, when you're from somewhere else, the best option is the easiest and most familiar one. This means that Jews from the rest of North America aren't meeting many singles from abroad.
Networking with people who live in another city or country can make the world a much smaller place. The community in the United Kingdom, and those in the rest of Europe, have diverse Jewish values and observances, just as North Americans do, and are thrilled when singles show up from Canada. So, take a chance and go abroad. You never know!
Eva Cohen is a freelance writer based in Leeds, England.
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