|
|
January 17, 2003
Listen to son's concern
A grandmother offers some sound advice to parents.
KAY ROSENFELD SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH BULLETIN
Dear Bubbe:
My nine-year-old son is all signed up for sleepaway camp. He's
already packed his trunk! Now, even though he was so excited, he
says he doesn't want to go. "No refunds, no exchanges,"
says the camp and besides, my sweetie and I have non-refundable
tickets to Paris.
Vacation Frustration
Dear Vacation:
The first time for anything is really scary, especially the first
time a child leaves his parents for sleepaway camp. Unlike me, you
obviously didn't prepare your children for camp by sending them
to sleepaway preschool – that's a joke – but you really
can smooth the way to summer camp. We are assuming, of course, that
you selected an appropriate camp for your particular child, one
that offers a wide diversity of activities beyond sports-oriented
ones, such as art, music, drama, computer and other group activities
of a noncompetitive nature and that you have investigated the camp
director, asked all the important questions about policies and staff
and spoken to other parents.
Although experts say 11 is the optimum age for overnight camp, there
are some that accept kids as young as six. Find those on the Web
at www.getthiskidoutofmysight.com. (Joke again.) Anyway, talk to
your son and really listen to his concerns. Although homesickness
occurs, it is said, in 83 per cent of campers, it usually disappears
within two or three days. If you have chosen wisely, your boy's
camp knows how to deal with it. For your part, write often but keep
your letters upbeat. Do not call unless there is a dire emergency,
the definition of which is at least four stitches. Don't make your
kids nuts by constantly seeking reassurances from them as to how
much fun they are having. They're only writing to you so they can
get into the mess hall for dinner. And speaking of camp food, it's
lousy – except on visitor's day – so get over it. They'll
eat in September.
Dear Bubbe:
My daughter is 11 and has been overweight for years. I am always
walking a tightrope because if I don't constantly nag her, she eats
everything in sight. Over her protests, I am sending her to a weight-loss
camp this summer. Will the results be worth the fight?
I'm Losing It But She's Not
Dear I'm:
As many as one in seven kids is obese and that number has tripled
since the '60s, putting these kids at risk for disease, as well
as those mean fat jokes. A weight-loss camp may be a good quick
start for a comprehensive weight-control program, but it is only
the first step. The best ones teach youngsters good nutrition and
exercise habits while stressing self esteem. Besides the fact that
they serve less food for more money ($1,000 a week and up), they're
like any other camp. Log on to summercamps.com or search for "weight-loss
camps."
The trouble is, your daughter will be home a lot longer than she'll
be at camp and, unless you enforce what she's learned during the
summer by setting good examples and facilitating lifestyle changes,
it's a losing proposition.
Dear Bubbe:
My son is going to sleepaway camp for a month this summer and I
am being torn apart by my emotions. I will miss him terribly but
I am also selfishly counting the days until he is gone! What can
I do about this Jewish guilt? My mother really must have done a
job on me.
Camped out for an Answer
Dear Camped:
Let's see if I have this straight. You're buying your son $1,000
worth of new clothes, sending him to a lush mountain retreat where
he will swim, play tennis and ride horses for 28 days at the cost
of a 1960s college education – and for this you're feeling
guilty? Of course you are. Leave your mother out of this. It comes
with the territory. It's baked in the matzah and simmered in the
chicken soup. You might consider the fact that he'll learn independence
and responsibility, make a bunch of new friends and drink thousands
of gallons of warm red bug juice. You'll learn (maybe) something
about letting go. Keep in mind that the little darling you're agonizing
over is the same rotten kid that stopped up the toilet yesterday.
I promise you that four weeks will go by as quick as you can say,
"He's back!" I wish somebody would send me to camp!
You can write to Dear Bubbe c/o Kay Rosenfeld, P.O. Box 630552,
Miami, Fla., 33163-0552, or e-mail [email protected].
^TOP
|
|
