Day school: pros and cons

KELLEY KORBIN

This summer, I found myself considering the idea of Jewish day school for my three children. I had never really pondered this option before, mainly because living on the North Shore made the prospect of twice-daily trips over two bridges seem too onerous to even consider. But the truth is that many kids (and their chauffeuring parents) make the trek from the North Shore, or other distant locales, to Vancouver or Richmond so their kids can enjoy a Jewish private school education.

Talking to some parents who make this daily sacrifice for their kids got me thinking that perhaps I should take a serious look at the advantages of Jewish day school and just what my kids might be missing. Of course, there are the obvious benefits that any private school provides: smaller class sizes, more tailoring to individual student needs and that uniform – which just has to facilitate a much-smoother process of getting the kids dressed and out the door in the morning.

But there are obvious drawbacks too: a hefty financial cost and my own personal bias that private schools can propagate elitism and snobbery. I have to admit that this latter opinion was bolstered recently at the doctor's office when a girl in a (non-Jewish) private school uniform pointed at my daughter and said, very loudly, to her mother, "That girl doesn't learn as much as me because she goes to public school, right, mommy?" Finally, that uniform which, while convenient, limits the kids' ability to express their individuality.

Nevertheless, attendance at Jewish day schools is growing in North America and with the establishment of the new King David High School in Vancouver, by all accounts a first-rate institution, I thought perhaps it was time I took a hard look at exactly what a Jewish day school could offer my kids that they weren't getting at public school. Besides, if I sent them to day school, they wouldn't have to spend four hours a week of their precious extra-curricular time at Hebrew school.

I decided to consult with some experts – educators, parents and kids – about the benefits of sending, or not sending, children to Jewish day school.

Shaul Wachsstock is the newly hired head of Judaics at King David. He is a strong advocate for Jewish day school education and told me that being in a committed Jewish environment gives a child a sense of pride in his or her identity and helps them become devoted to some kind of Jewish practice for life. He put it this way: "If you swim in it, you will understand it and want to continue in it."

Fair enough, but does day school have a monopoly on commitment? Can't religious school offer the same thing?

Not really, said Ella Levy, Richmond Jewish Day School's (RJDS's) new head of school. She stressed the well-documented educational benefits of learning Hebrew (or any other second language) and the "sense of connection to our people and our culture" that kids in day school receive. She added that in her experience, parents of day school kids tend to be more committed to ongoing quality Jewish education, whereas in religious school, the focus is mainly on the basics. She said that kids who attend religious school don't generally continue their Jewish studies after their bar or bat mitzvahs.

That may be true for some families, but nowadays religious schools aren't what they were when I was growing up. In fact, my children truly enjoy going to Sunday school and are developing a very real, and what I believe will be a lifelong, commitment to their religion. Even without continuing their religious studies, they can stay involved in Judaism post-b'nai mitzvah, through their participation in youth groups and summer camps.

Sara Levine and Max Collett also subscribe to this sentiment. They sent their son, Nathan, to Vancouver Talmud Torah for preschool, with which they were very satisfied. They felt their son got an excellent foundation for his school career. Nevertheless, after what Levine characterized as a "very, very difficult decision for us," they decided to send Nathan to their neighborhood French immersion public school for kindergarten, supplemented by religious school at Temple Sholom. Levine said that what ultimately compelled her to put Nathan in public school was the opportunity for him to go to school with kids in his neighborhood. That being said, Levine acknowledges that it's not always convenient getting Nathan to religious school on Sunday mornings and she has not ruled out moving him back to Talmud Torah sometime in the future. But for now, the benefits of having school friends within five or six blocks of their home and the independence that Nathan is gaining in their neighborhood mean that he'll be back at public school this year.

On the other hand, Karen Winrob sent her two children to RJDS for kindergarten and they have both chosen to endure an hour's bus travel each day in order to attend King David this fall. Winrob said she never even considered public school for her children.

"Even though I'm not particularly religious, I'm Jewish," she said. "When they grow up, my kids can practise however they choose, but they have to know what they came from to make an informed choice." She admitted there are some drawbacks to Jewish day school: "It's so close-knit, sometimes it seems like everyone knows your business." But she said that's all about the parents, not the kids, and added that she "put all that aside" so that her kids could receive what she feels is a better education by going to private Jewish day school.

So much for the parents, what do the kids think about their education? Brady Winrob, a vivacious 12-year-old girl, said, "RJDS was really amazing. I liked going to Jewish day school because you're with a bunch of people who mostly believe the same thing as you do. It's really easy and nice to have friends you can have discussions with and it feels safe."

My public school-attending son, Jake, also 12, pointed out that he has a lot of Jewish friends from our synagogue and from camp and that he likes having non-Jewish friends from school. He added, "I don't think I've missed out on anything [by not attending a Jewish day school] because I had a great Hebrew school and I feel like I know just as much about Jewish culture as my friends who go to day school, just not as much about the language – and the culture is a lot more important to me."

Everyone I spoke with agreed that some kind of Jewish education for their children is important to them. Where they differed was in choosing the best way to accomplish that for their families.

Kelley Korbin is a freelance writer living in West Vancouver.

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