Brave, classy, unforgettable

RORY RICHARDS

As the only Canadian to ever syndicate a talk radio show in the United States, Rhona Raskin's professional success and unique energy are known to millions of her listeners. After the launch of her first successful radio show, Sex, Lies and Audiotape, 15 years ago, she also began a popular syndicated advice column, Ask Rhona, which appeared in the Province.

I recently had the opportunity to have an unforgettably candid conversation with Rhona. For those few who never heard her on the radio, take it from me: this lady is brave, classy and unforgettable.

Name: Rhona Raskin.

Hebrew Name: Rachael.

My mother was born in: California.

My father was born in: Edmonton.

I grew up in: Montreal.

Did you grow up in a traditional Jewish household? My Jewishness extends to blintzes, challah and matzah balls. We went to synagogue on High Holy Days. I thought we were there to see what people were wearing because I didn't understand Hebrew. It was more of a fashion show to me.

How is your Yiddish? I learned enough to know when I was being talked about. I know draykop, shmendrik and a few good sayings.

How would you define your occupation at this point in your career? I guess I'm a writer now. I still do my syndicated column and am finishing my second book but I've been off the radio for three years.

Really? Why is that? Do you really want to know?

Yes. My son died three years ago.

Oh my G-d, I had no idea. I'm so sorry. How did it happen? He came home from school and – well – he died. Quincy was 17. Even after all those tests, they still couldn't figure [out] how a healthy boy could just suddenly die.

How did you possibly survive as a parent? Without my friends and community, I don't know if I would have. I had one friend who came over every day for six months. She just showed up on my doorstep every day.

Did any of your skills as a therapist help to shed any perspective or give you any skills to cope with that kind of immense grief? No.

How about being Jewish or Judaism? Yes, that. I have a dark sense of humor and it helped a lot. I came from generations of people that survived. I have to credit them and that history as giving me an inner strength.

Pen and paper or Blackberry? Blackberry.

How many voicemails a day do you get? 8-10.

How many e-mails a day do you get? 5,890,000. Mostly people looking for advice.

What book are you reading right now? A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson.

How many hours of work per week? About 40.

What new business initiatives are you working on? A screenplay. I have been really fortunate in my career to be able to tick off that "things I want to do before I drop dead" list – like have a radio show, a TV show, etc. Now I would just really like to make a movie.

What's the screenplay about? When my son died, all of his friends came over and they basically stayed for three months. His last girlfriend lived with us for a year after Quincy died. He was a brilliant writer and he wrote screenplays. So my screenplay is about his friends and the past three years. I held them together and they held me together. We held each other.

Describe your approach to your work and life: It's the same approach for both and it's simple: never buy someone else's definition of who you are.

Who would you want to have dinner with (dead or alive/Jewish or not)? Christopher Walken, Milan Kundera, Eminem ("He's a great poet. I'd love to know how his mind works"), Hillary Clinton, Eve (of Genesis fame).

Ever been to Israel? No.

Are you tempted or curious to go? Sure, if they give me a helmet and a bulletproof vest and agree to a ceasefire for the duration of my stay there.

Last time you were in shul? Three weeks ago in Toronto.

What was the occasion? Bar mitzvah.

Do you draw upon any Jewish values or wisdom in your work? For sure, in terms of a sense of family, sense of humor and community. I hardly rate on the scale of observant Jewry, but I can say this: if I get on a bus, I will know who the other Jew is on the bus and they will know me. It just happens. It's intuitive.

What has it been like being a woman in the radio broadcast industry? I will quote a consultant of mine who actually works in radio. He said, "Radio is run by grey-haired white guys." It's true and it can be a brutal old boys' club, but if you want to be in radio, you have to work with what is.

One woman who has certainly climbed her way to the top of radio is Dr. Laura. Your thoughts? She's scary. She definitely has talent and she has a mesmerizing way about her. I also don't disagree with a lot of what she says. The reason I find her scary, aside from the fact she talks about her kid and it's hard enough to be a kid without your mom talking about you on air to millions of people, is the place from where she is coming. I find her embarrassing and I don't think she's what being Jewish is about. I think she is self-absorbed and controlling. She may have good things to say, but it gets lost in her egotism.

What role does Judaism play in your life? Food, humor, my friends and family.

What makes you most proud to be Jewish? Humor and survival. What's that old joke? Why are there more Jewish violinists than pianists? Because it's easier to run with a violin case than a piano.

Rory Richards is co-owner of Richards and Chan, a Vancouver PR and event planning company.

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