Generations to come

JOAN G. FRIEDMAN

One of my favorite paintings is "Dor l'Dor" ("Generation to Generation") by Mordecai Rubenstein. I received a copy as a gift and it is hanging in my foyer, so all can see my motto. What could be better than handing down traditions and family values?

Every time I see my daughter making hamantashen with her children for Purim, I see my mother teaching her the skill. In fact, my daughter is just like her. Every time I place tzimmes on the table for Rosh Hashanah, I see my own grandmother doing the same. Whenever my son phones to discuss business with me, I remember my father teaching me all the important questions to ask and plans to be discussed. In fact, everyone says it: my son is just like him.

So what will I be leaving my own children and grandchildren? I have some old photographs. Friends have done just this. By having as many copies as you have children, they have made individual scrapbooks for each child and, sometimes, each grandchild as well.

A friend of mine received a memory box as a gift, and this truly enthralled me. I purchased two of them and proceeded to place things important to me in each. It consisted of photographs of my children's grandparents and mementos of my children's growing-up years. Favorite poems and remembrances of my own parents accompany the papers. Anything that might be important between each of them and their dad and me is included.

Next, I bought the same boxes for our grandchildren and began to fill them in the same way. The boxes are beautiful and each has a brass nameplate on it, which I took to the jewellers and had inscribed. I can see them handing it down to their own grandchildren.

While I can change or add items any time I wish, the first thing each will see when the box is opened is a favorite photo of each with their parents and grandparents. It took a lot of searching, but I know I have found the perfect frames for each person; I made certain it is in their taste and know they will enjoy them.

The good news is that they don't know about them. And they won't receive them until I'm not here – so I hope they don't have them to enjoy for a long, long time.

Compiling the boxes brought back so many wonderful memories of me with my own parents. They are in our lives with every holiday and every time a new memory is made. In fact, how can I miss my parents so, when they are right here with me?

Joan G. Friedman, the former editor of Shalom newspaper, Reading, Penn., can be reached at [email protected].

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